ByLiv Sommerlot, writer at
Liv Sommerlot

There comes a time in every child's life when they encounter something so deranged, so terrifying, so grotesque, that the image itself becomes burned into their retinas, haunting them in their dreams every night like some kind of Freddy Krueger-esque demon come to slowly pull his claws over their throat.

If you know a child who's yet to experience this life-scarring phenomenon, then do not show them this picture.

No longer will we want to be the very best like no one ever was.

No longer can we win the fight arm in arm—not with this team, and not with this dream...

A monstrosity has been created that will change the way we look at Pokémon... forever.

Observe its beady eyes, its abhorrently thin waist, its ghastly neck claws reaching, reaching, reaching around its shapely, striped neck. The mere sight of this Frankensteinian creation is enough to make children cry, to bring grown men to their knees, to make the Heavens weep! Who would create such a repugnant atrocity? Why would someone create such a repugnant atrocity?!

Dare I take a closer look?

Oh, mournful and terrible engine of Horror and of Crime!

My fingers tremble as I attempt to type. Is that its breath I feel upon my neck? As those eyes stare into my soul and siphon every ounce of happiness left within these brittle bones? Surely this is the face of Death itself come to rip the final threads of life tying me to this world.

So much of insufferable wo! Alas! neither by day nor by night will I know the blessing of Rest any more!

Those claws of agony, or purplish hue, manufactured for tearing and thrashing and rending limb from limb. Those yellowish egg sacs upon its torso growing and groaning and preparing for the day it will set forth its heathenish offspring upon this world.

But may God shield and deliver me from the fangs of the Arch-Fiend!

Those behemothic ankles wrapped in golden chains! One strike from those ample appendages would surely send even the strongest of men straight into the bowels of purgatory whilst whimpering like suckling babes.

Yes, it would seem there is only one thing to do when faced with such a despicable, contemptible creature from hell...

...have a good ol' guessing game!

Is that a Bidoof I spy? How about a Staryu? Ho-Oh? Registeel?

How many Pokémon can you identify in this monstrous mish-mash of mammoth proportions? It's not easy! Some Pokémon only lend a detail here, a pattern there, a fin, an arm, a tail... but a true Pokémon master would be able to spot them all.

Other (less tame) Pokémon fusions for those who can't handle the heat:

Go ahead—give us a number! How many different Pokémon make up this Poké-chimera? Can you identify them all? Or has this Poké-beast bested you?

[source: pokesoku]


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