When you think of #Pokemon, what do you picture?
For some people, it's this set of BFFs:
For others, they envision this little piece of Heaven:
But what may cross the mind of only the die-hard Pokemon fans are the more morbid stories; tales of laboratory clones, life-sucking parasites, and dream-sucking...things.
If Pokemon was a little creepy to you as a child, prepare to have those feelings justified with the weirdest origin stories and fan theories out there.
1. Paras/Parasect - Origin
Anyone who likes bugs as much as Pokemon creator Satoshi Tajiri will know that whenever you have a parasitic relationship with them, there is some pretty heavy zombie stuff going on. In the Paras' case, there is a parasitic mushroom that attaches itself to the back of an insect, forming this Pokemon. There's nothing set in stone, but one can imagine what's going on here. It could be as simple as the mushroom getting nourishment from the insect somehow, or as horrifying as the mushroom taking complete control of the insect's body and brain, and even worse, its reproductive system.
2. Mewtwo - Origin
Scientists wanted to created an ultra-powerful Pokemon, so they found themselves a fossil of a Mew, the strongest Pokemon known, and went to town. One scientist had an ulterior motive of cloning his dead daughter, which....yeah, that doesn't help the story one bit. Here's the uncut story of Mewtwo:
So, the cloned daughter dies, and Mewtwo is sad. You would have expected the little guy to go on a murderous, vengeful rampage. Which...is kind of exactly what he did.
3. Jynx – Origin
The looks alone of this #PokemonGo creature should be enough to elicit nightmares. She'll dance for you, then kiss you and put you to sleep. The legend that inspired her?: The Yama-uba. According to Japanese legend, they lived in the icy mountains, similar to sirens in that they would sing and lure people to their death. That death included, but wasn't limited to, getting eaten by the old hag.
It's almost like the Japanese, when they came up with Pokemon, were often thinking, “What can we do to make these things creepier?”
4. Aerodactyl/Zubat – Theory
Evolution in the Pokemon world and in the real world are just a teensy bit different, and in this case, the theory is that while Zubat evolves (Pokemon-wise) into Golbat, Aerodactyl actually evolved (real world style) into the Zubat. Normally, evolution is cool, right? Not in this case. Check out the side-by-side:
What kind of world allows a badass like the Aerodactyl, with hands AND feet (and visible eyes) to evolve down into a Zubat? The little guy can't even hold onto a tree branch if he wants to take a break from flying.
5. Gengar/Clefable/Voltorb – Theory
Let's see if I can get this right. Gastly evolves into Haunter, and Haunter into Gengar. Clefairy turns into Clefable, and Voltorb into Electrobe. Assuming I didn't mess anything up, what if Gengar is just a dead Clefable? As horrible as it sounds, seeing how adorable the Clefable is, the similarities are there: three fingers, big ears, funky hair...it looks like we have the ghost of a Clefable. But then you have this:
It's kind of kooky that you have a freaking pokeball flying around, acting all possessed, isn't it? Notice the eyes...could it be the Voltorb is just a Haunter-haunted pokeball?
So after all that we, have a dead cute fairies and haunted balls. Gotcha!
PokeIntermission time. Here is some good pokestuff!
- Pokemon's "Blood-Soaked Crescent”: Mega-Evolutions Were Immoral All Along!
- Too Dark For A Kids Game: Does 'Pokemon Sun And Moon' Close The Case On A 20-Year-Old Theory?
- Gotta Catch Em' All - 12 Of The Strangest Pokémon Conspiracies Unwrapped!
6. Ditto – Theory
Either way you look at this one, it's pretty sad. On one hand, Ditto appears to be an amoeba with a mouth and eyes. That means it basically has no backstory, seeing how it's just...there. A tiny blob that, when it wants kids, it makes them itself.
The other possibility goes back to Mewtwo and its sad backstory. Scientists tend to screw things up a lot before the get them right, right? So who's to say that they didn't accidentally produce a Ditto during their attempts to clone Mew? That cat was pretty powerful in its day, and with Mew being able to transform like a Ditto, it's possible!
7. Cubone – Origin & Theory
This one's a tearjerker, and a little morbid. Okay, so it's a lot morbid. Cubone, you see, wears its dead mother's skull as a helmet out of mourning for her. The bone it carries? Who knows, that might be mom's femur. But who is mama? That's where the origin story stops and the theory starts. Cubone seems to look a little bit like this guy when placed side by side:
Kangaskhan, a famous mother-type Pokemon, looks like she could be the owner of that skull and femur.
8. Drowzee – Origin
Who wouldn't want that sweet looking little fella showing up in their room at midnight with the sole intention of sucking a person's dreams out through their nostrils? Because, well, that's who they are and what they do.
9. Vileplume – Origin
I was pretty stoked the other day when I finally got to evolved one of my depressing Glooms into a Vileplume, but imagine my dismay when I find out that they're based off the Rafflesia arnoldii, or corpse flower.
If you have those damn Bradford Pear trees in your neighborhood like us, then you know that these things STINK. The tree and the flower both smell like rotting flesh.
And like the poor Paras and his mushroom hitchhiker, this flower is a soul-sucking parasite, as well.
10. Ninetails – Origin
Evolved from Vulpix, Ninetails, at least in the Pokemon world, has the power of mind control, and will curse those who mistreat it. That doesn't sound bad enough? Well then: Japanese folklore states that the Kitsune is a fox with up to nine tails, one tail for each of the 100 years it's been alive. Shapeshifting, possession, and extremely intelligent, the Kitsune were known to drive people mad, or possess young women by entering their body under their fingernails or through their breasts.
Not enough to put a stop to this fun? Some Kitsune were also able to feed on the spirit of a human, through sexual contact. Whee!
Okay, that'll be all for now. In order to wash all that creepiness out of your mind, here's 20 years of Pokemon to celebrate:
What is your favorite Pokemon origin story or theory? Do you have any favorites that aren't on here? Share in the comments!