Everyone who's grown up since the late '90s has probably owned a stash of Pokemon merchandise. Bedspreads, toys, cards, even shampoo—Pokemon stuff was everywhere, especially in our room.
But most of you probably never owned anything nearly as nightmarish as these bootleg toys, because if they'd been in your childhood closet you probably wouldn't have slept again.
These 10 Pokemon Bootleg Toys Will Give You Nightmares
From the depths of the web and the assembly lines of lead-lined Chinese factories come 10 #Pokemon toys that are horrifying, mutated and sometimes just plain unrecognizable.
1. Oh God, What Did They Do To You?
These two look like Ash left his pokeballs in a hot car for too long.
2. Absol-utely Nightmarish
This turns up at your window at night and starts speaking in a deep human voice, what do you do?!
3. One Of These Things Is Not Like The Others
One of these things just doesn't belong (on this material plane).
4. I Think My 5 Year Old Nephew Painted These
And ate Bulbasaur's bulb while he was at it.
5. Azumarill Got A Nose Job
A horrible, horrible nose job.
6. Pokemon 3 Is Getting Pretty Wild With The Designs
These all look like Mimikyu branched out into trying to be terrifying versions of other Pokemon
7. We Need To Talk About Celebi
I think I saw this guy on a featured role in The X-Files. Or maybe The Hum: Abductions
8. Squirtle Squad Goals
I can't tell if this is Squirtle Squad badly cosplaying as the Ninja Turtles or vice-versa.
9. Mewtwo Skipped Leg Day
I guess he's now a Fighting type, too. Pretty horrifying, but not nearly as horrifying as the grand finale...
10. Misty's Fallen On Hard Times
She really took it badly after Ash rejected her, turning straight to the rare candies.
Let's hope they don't make a knock-off Usain Bolt toy now he's entered the world of Pokemon. I don't even want to know what they'd do to the poor man.
Did these Pokemonstrosities terrify you to the core? Got your own insane bootleg merchandise to share? Let us know in the comments!