ByRob Harris, writer at
Sometimes I play video games.
Rob Harris

The wonderfully open-ended Hitman series has never been about getting the job done. It's about getting the job done right. Sure, you can always whip out the classic dual Silverballers and pump your target full of lead, but where's the fun in that when Agent 47's more than capable of concocting elaborate murder blueprints in that twisted bald head of his.

From murders on the dance floor, to blood and ice-cream sandwiches, these are five truly inspired homicides.

5. Alvaro D’Alvade — A Historical Execution

Game: 'Blood Money'

When 47 arrives at the Paris opera, he arrives in style. Weimar-chic style, that is.

With rehearsals for Giacomo Puccini's tragic Tosca in full swing, your target Alvaro D’Alvade is busy slipping into character while you're busy swapping a replica WWI pistol for the real thing. The only thing left to do is let your own masterpiece play out in full view of an audience that's none the wiser. Perfecto!

4. Chad Bingham Jr. — Hot Tub Freefall

Game: 'Blood Money'

You'd have thought the architects who designed a jacuzzi with a glass base that hovers precariously over a bottomless ravine would've stopped and considered the potential health and safety hazards.

No matter, Agent 47 is a considerate fellow. I don't need to explain what happens next...

Sayonara, Chad.

3. Lorne De Havilland — Death by Porn

Game: 'Blood Money'

Every target has a weakness, it just so happens to be that Lorne de Havilland's is his penchant for smut. As he's distracted by the forbidden temptation of X-rated photos, 47 is free to rig the above lighting fixture with an RU-AP mine. And just like that, it's lights out for Havilland.

2. Dom Osmond — Party Pooper

Game: 'Absolution'

Last night a DJ ended my life at the Vixen Club. Here, the party gets truly messy when a certain contract killer pops up, and a certain disco ball drops down.

This death by disco ball is made all the more satisfying due to the fact that Osmond is one smarmy individual. I didn't even feel the slightest twinge of guilt pulling that lever to unleash the glittering orb of unfortunate fate.

1. Lenny Dexter — Sundae Bloody Sundae

Game: 'Absolution'

Agent 47 really is a sweet guy once you get to know him, as Dexter found out. This awesome little Easter Egg only triggers when you kill every bird in the surrounding desert, unleashing a rampaging ice-cream truck that mows your target down.

Watch the madness unfold below:

The new Hitman game launches on PlayStation 4, Xbox One and PC on March 11.

What's your favorite 'Hitman' assassination?


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