Posted by Jade Tyler
Jade Tyler

If I asked you to quick fire answer the question “who is the creepiest Pokémon?”, your answer would probably be Cubone or Hypno, right? Total classics. Don’t get me wrong, the whole skull of the dead mother and creepy lullaby thing still scares me, but let’s have a look at some other spine-chilling entries in the Pokémon universe.

We've all read a Creepypasta or two, and know at least a little bit about the darker side of Pokémon, but here's a few pocket monsters that straight up belong in a horror game.

I always thought Banette was actually pretty cute. It's got that sneaky little grin and stumpy body that makes you just wanna pick him up and take him home to your mum. After finding out a bit more about it though, it's sweet appearance is clearly just a cover up for it's haunting back story. Banette was actually a plush doll that became a Pokémon after he was put in the trash by a child. C'mon Banette, so what if your kid grew out of you and got into other stuff? Doesn't mean you have to turn into a living demon and try to avenge yourself. Banette sure does know how to hold a grudge and now spends it's time lurking in dark alleys, searching for the child that disowned it. Just let it go, little dude.

I hear what you're asking, what can be so terrifying about a Cactus Pokémon? A cute little Cactusmon? Well, I'll tell you what - absolutely everything. From it's mouth made up of black holes, to the huge piercing spikes and evil yellow eyes. Appearance isn't all that's sinister about this terrible being though, they also have a dark story. Cacturne live in the heat, and specifically in deserts. They're mostly active at night, and will often move in packs, following travellers until they can no longer move. No one knows what they follow people for, but I can't say I'd feel comfortable being stalked by one of these green beasts in the middle of the night.

We all know why Drowzee is frightening. But I still can't fathom why it's allowed to exist, like shouldn't they have been wiped out by now? If a cult of people decided to break into children's bedrooms and eat their dreams, they would be arrested. Drowzee is honestly one of the weirdest and creepiest Pokémon out there. Imagine putting your son little Jimmy to bed at night, only to come in later to check on him, to find a Drowzee sat by his bedside, eating his dreams. The fact it also remembers every dream it eats is sickening, like, what do they do with these dreams? Just collect them? Guess they gotta catch 'em all.

This Pokémon makes me think of a disguised villain in a Scooby Doo episode, you know the ones, where it'd be a person with a bin over their head trying to look like a robot, attempting to chase people out of a town? Then they'd take the lid off the bin and it'd just be the janitor of the local school, except with this guy, there is no disguise. In fact, there is no body - Dusclops are completely hollow. Apparently they're like a black hole and they absorb things into their body, but nothing will ever come back out. This is totally horrifying. If you were in battle with this Pokémon and they accidentally swallowed your Pokémon (this is clearly a regular occurrence), you'd never see them again, cya later Jigglypuff.

Gorebyss looks like something you'd find in the exotic section of your local aquarium, it's pretty adorable and seems like it'd make a neat pet. However, the clue really is in the name with Gorebyss. Whilst it's a delight to look at, this fish will quite literally pierce your skin with it's sharp mouth, and drink your insides. Gory. There's not much else to say other than this pretty little fish has it's prey's bodily fluids floating around in it's delightful stomach as it swims. Gore-some.

Okay, straight off a bat, I will not trust a Pokémon that looks like a possessed pumpkin. This monster embodies and represents Halloween, and has the classic pumpkin grin to prove it. This pumpkin doesn't just sit on your windowsill and warn off bad spirits though, it's alive and likes to do the total opposite. I think the weird beanstalk on his head must be controlling it or something, telling it to do awful things. Not only does Gourgeist wrap it's arms around it's prey, it sings joyfully as it watches it's prey suffer. Sadistic little weirdo.

Goodra is a strange one, as technically it doesn't really belong in a horror game, although that Pokédex entry really did sell it for me. This purple black market Barney the Dinosaur is actually really weird if you look at it for too long. It's oozing green gunge, and has retractable horns. It can also throw punches with it's cute little fists that are the equivalent of the force of 100 pro boxers. I mean, I'm not sure what that equates to in terms of force, but i'm pretty sure that's something to be scared of. Imagine this maniac bouncing towards you, only to give you a hug that ends up crushing you by accident. This ditsy looking dragon type seems like it belongs in a comedy horror, perhaps a Barney the Dinosaur spin-off where he goes around killing kids instead of teaching them (I'm so sorry).

Phantump is a tree stump that's actually a dead child, simply put. According to old tales, all Phantump were once children, roaming the forrest on their merry way, then they got lost. No clue what happened to them after they got lost, but clearly they were lost long enough to die, and come back as tree stumps. Everything about this Pokémon's appearance is down right spooky, from it's big creepy eyes, to it's tiny 'o' shaped mouth. Weirdly, if you look hard enough you can kinda see the resemblance of a kid (I think it's the tiny arms). I'm not sure of Phantump's purpose, it kinda just exists. It's not like it's trying to avenge itself or anything, it seems pretty content with wandering around giving people a fright.

Yamask is straight from the depths of hell. It's clearly been dragged out from a pit somewhere and been stuck in Unova. If you don't know anything about Yamask, in the most basic way of explaining it, it looks like a possessed bird, holding a human face. It's said to be holding the face of when it was human. Yeah, you heard that right, it's holding it's face, back from when it was human. I'm not sure why specifically the face, and why all of these people clearly had the exact same face before they got turned into Yamasks. Either way, it carries the expressionless head and occasionally looks at it and has a good old cry. Not the kind of thing you want to bump into in a dark alleyway.

We're onto the final Poké-monstrosity, and let's end it with a bang. Literally. Yveltal is savagely selfish. When it's life comes to an end, it'll absorb every living thing around it, and implode back into a cocoon. It may as well be screaming "if I go down, you're all coming with me". Yveltal is pretty fantastic to look at, but you'll wanna be viewing it from binoculars. If you're too close to it when it decides to give up living, you may find yourself sucked into it's black hole of an explosion and therefore passing with it. Totally mad, should definitely be sent back to the hole it crawled out from.

So that concludes my list of Pokémon that need to be ripped from the cartridge and put in Five Nights at Freddy's, or sent on a vacation to Silent Hill. All of these sadists had their own creepy quirks that gave them a particularly haunting feeling, some of them were even eerie to look at. I'll conclude by saying that none of these demons would ever make it to a 'Who's That Pokémon?', because the answer of "that's actually a dead child!" doesn't tend to go down well.

If you've got a certain Pokémon that gives you the creeps, feel free to drop it's evil name down in the comments!