So, you've downloaded this crazy new Pokemon GO game and you're all excited to go outside and see what all the hype is about. Maybe you've played Pokemon in the past, maybe this is your first time. No matter, you've found a handy 101 guide to the game and feel pretty confident that you can become the very best. You head outside to begin catching Pokemon andÃ¢ÂÂ Oh no! You forgot that it's date night. Can the evening possibly be saved?!
Yes, yes it can. For you see, a Pokemon GO adventure is actually the perfect first date anyone can ask for. Why? I'll give you five perfectly good reasons why!
0. Asking someone to catch Pokemon with you is the single greatest pickup line ever.
Okay, okay, before we get into the crux of PokeDate Night, you should probably make sure your date knows what Pokemon GO actually is (though, if your date hasn't at least heard of it, that may be a sign.) What's the best way to do this? I'm glad you asked! Time for a good ol' fashioned sample conversation:
"Hey, so nice to meet you! What exactly did you have in mind? Dinner and a movie?"
"Actually, I had something... different in mind. I hope I'm not being too forward, but would you like to catch water Pokemon at the beach with me tonight?"
This line will not only actively intrigue and excite your date, it will also let them know that you're a Mew-level rare find. Now onto the date itself!
1. PokeStops are found in perfect date locations.
Sure, you had plans to go to that kinda-nice-but-not-too-nice restaurant and talk over food, but those plans were more vanilla than the Coke you were going to order and you hate talking in between bites anyway. You know what's a million times better than those plans? Taking a walk through the park, a trip to a museum, or a cross-campus trek.
Yes, all those locations you've seen filtered through dozens of Instagram pictures are actually perfect places to conduct your Pokemon Date of Destiny. Not only do they make for a great adventure, they're filled with PokeStops Ã¢ÂÂ and the two of you are sure to catch Pokemon while out gallivanting. Just be careful not to move too quickly Ã¢ÂÂ Pokemon GO can take you to some weird places, after all.
2. You can show off your sensitive, caring side.
Pokemon are cute. Sure, you're eventually going to run into some yucky Muks or creepy Hypnos, but isn't that how everything in life is? (You get bonus points for turning Pokemon into metaphors during your date, just FYI.) Especially as you start out, you're likely to encounter the early evolutions of Pokemon Ã¢ÂÂ a.k.a., the cutest ones. Use this as an opportunity to display just how caring and empathetic you can be toward small, adorable creatures.
Oh, and if you find an egg? Treat that thing like a precious baby unicorn that's learned how to give you puppy-dog eyes. "Yeah, I learned my Poke-Egg-caring skills from all the time I spent as a volunteer babysitter for my neighborhood's troubled youth," you'll say casually as you monitor the egg's hatch progress with loving eyes. Guys and gals alike won't be able to help but notice what a softy you are beneath your suave exterior.
3. It'll reveal your compatibility before the end of the night.
Now that you've had time to catch Pokemon, you're surely close to hitting level 5. Note: This is a critical point in the date, and the rest of the night depends on what's about to happen. When it comes time to pick teams, you Ã¢ÂÂ being the thoughtful and caring person you are Ã¢ÂÂ let your date pick first.
If your date picks anything other than Team Mystic, the date is over and you chide them for their terrible life choices.
4. Should your date continue, battling at 'Pokemon GO' Gyms is the perfect display of your newfound teamwork.
Did you survive that nail-biting moment of truth? Good! You may as well start planning the wedding now, because you two are made for each other.
And speaking of planning, you two should probably start planning your hostile takeover of all the nearby Gyms because those teenage punks and their Eevee-lutions don't stand a chance against the two of you (especially if you've armed yourself with the strongest tool of them all, knowledge).
You go Flying-type, your date goes Ground-type. You attack, your date dodges. You win...your date wins, too. If a better way to show off how well you two work as a team exists, I'd like to see it.
5. Even if the date is a bust, you still get Pokemon
I mean, really, imagine everything on this datestravaganza had instead happened solo. Pretty good night walking around and catching more Pokemon, right? I'd say so! If the date is a total bust, it doesn't mean you wasted all your time.
Plus, by the end of the night, you probably figured out the best route to take to maximize PPH (PokeStops per hour). This is one of a trainer's most valuable pieces of knowledge and will surely impress on any future dates.
Bonus: You probably didn't spend much.
I mean, unless things were going really well and you bought your date some PokeCoins Ã¢ÂÂ which is a second-date move for all but the best of us Ã¢ÂÂ you probably paid for, what, gas? And your date just had such a good time, they didn't even notice.